idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
