I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
