can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
