we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
