I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
