youre lurking in front of me
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
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