Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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