Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
