pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
