how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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