did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
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