Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Acid is not a monday night drug
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
