Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
