I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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