I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
