I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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