I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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