We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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