So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
