but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
