i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
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