Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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