FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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