Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Randomize
