5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
