She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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