so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
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