I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
