oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
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