Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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