She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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