You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
