So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
