he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize