just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Randomize
