rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
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