its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
