I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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