i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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