Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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