I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
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