Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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