I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
