I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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