I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
