Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
