Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Randomize
