I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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