He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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