There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
they call him Oral-B. enough said
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
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